Kid Art Softie

Kid art is amazing. It's whimsical and colorful. It's scribbly and unrestrained. The characters and creatures kids often draw are otherworldly, impossible and beautiful. Kids' minds are bursting with imagination that hasn't yet become bogged down by "reality" and ordinariness. And hopefully they never will be. May we all see the world through the weirdo eyes of children!

I've seen a lot of companies and individuals on the internet that make custom softies based on children's art, and I always think, "Hey, I could do that." My boss showed me a picture that her six-year-old drew of a really cool-looking clown, so I decided to give it a shot. 

I spent a good amount of time giving this artwork some pretty serious analysis. From the dramatic outlining to the sumptuous layering of color, I love everything about it.

I love how it has kind of an "Ernie & Bert" quality to the facial features, but as I started felting the face together, I thought mine looked more Mr. Potato Head. 

Eventually, it came together though. I made it much in the same way I make my little softie dolls, including using pipe cleaners in the arms and legs, though I carefully folded and wrapped the pointed ends of the pipe cleaners so they wouldn't ever poke through the felt (though I'm certain this doll wouldn't pass any kind of toy safety regulation test so, "disclaimer!"). 

Here he is! His name is actually "Cupcake," I found out from the artist's mother. 

Here's the side by side comparison. I think I did a pretty good job capturing the essence of Cupcake, but I'm just the structural engineer who brought the artist and designer's work to soft sculpture life. 

Cupcake in his safe space.

His favorite book, obvi. 

This photo makes me want to cry. It's like, such childlike yearning!

Nap time! The most underrated part of childhood. 

Meta kid art! 

Handmade Holiday 2013 in the Softie Sweat Shop

Handmade Holiday 2013 is well underway, and an impulsive decision to take part in a vendor market a week in advance has me churning out the softies and Xmas tree ornaments in what I’m now calling my Softie Sweat Shop. The Softie Sweat Shop offers workers comfortable working conditions and many benefits, such as dry fingertips and tiny stab wounds.

I’ve been working in a lot of multiples, as well as working on many softies at once so I’m never bored with my projects. If I’m over owls, I set them aside and work on sugar skulls. If I don’t feel like coming up with creative details, I can cut out a bunch of starter softies to decorate later. It’s a perfect system! Never mind the haphazard chaos of my crafting room, where various piles of in-progress projects sit in random areas, sometimes under books, craft supplies or a cat.

Here are some of the fruits of that labor--things that will be available for sale tomorrow, Saturday Dec. 14 at the 12th Avenue Patio Sale at 12th Avenue and Desoto (unless it rains, then here is a sneak preview of my soon-to-be-awesome etsy shop)!

If you're a devoted fan who has followed this amazingly consistent blog for several years, you might remember these little pencil/makeup/change bags from the time I failed to sell them at the Port City Market circa 2009. They're still available, but demand is obviously high!

 These are larger sugar skull softies but for all you know they're microscopic because this photo has no scale. They have a little bean bagginess to weigh them down and help them stand upright. They're probably 6 or 7 inches high and they have little "fug" tags on them.

 I really like this angry looking cat. I'm hoping a lot of other people also really like it and that this shared interest will translate into cash in my unsold felted money bag.

 Please tell me owls are still a thing. I made a whole bunch of them.

Whoa. Do you even understand how serious this is? I had BUSINESS CARDS made, because when it comes to felt, I mean BUSINESS. Special thanks to Sam with knitting company Meat Warmer for designing these cards!

More sugar skulls. Come buy them!

Your Mama the Llama

I'm going to Peru in a week so I've got mountains, Machu Picchu, delicious cuy and practicing mi Espanol on my mind. I wanted to try creating a softie that uses a blanket stitch all the way around it so I chose the llama as my design for its simple shape and Andean ancestry. Also as a child I read that book "Is Your Mama a Llama?" a lot and I feel a special connection with these graceful beasts as my mother is in fact a llama.

First I cut out two llama shapes, and then an underbody shape so that it would have four distinct legs. I have no pattern so I just folded a piece of felt between the legs and cut to make the underbody and it ended up seeming too fat.

I just folded it in half again and sewed a line down the middle to thin it down a bit. 

Next I stitched an eye and nostril on each side of the llama faces. I did a quick practice of my blanket stitch on a scrap piece of felt. For the ears I cut out two roundish diamond ear shapes, folded them in half, and put a small gray stitch to hold them in place. 

Next I started stitching around. I just cut that heart out initially to make the shapes photo cuter, but I ended up liking the way it looked with the gray so I stitched it on his sweet little haunch! 

I stitched and stuffed as I went because I wanted the legs to be nice and full to help him stand up. I'm calling him Blanket after the stitch used and the child of the late Michael Jackson. 

Once completed, my associate Tobi asked if it was a donkey. 

Or a Lochness Monster. You be the judge!

The above photo shows how the underbody piece fit in there. It gave Blanket a nice 3D-ness, but his legs splay out a little bit, which gives him that "Lochness Monster" effect we discussed earlier. 

Self awareness.

I will leave you with this thing I learned while researching this article: a llama mating call is called an "orgle," a buzzing gurgle that the male llama or alpaca makes when he becomes aroused until he finishes the act. Hot. 

DIY Fourth of July Pt. II

This post marks the 11th post this year--more posts than I've ever posted in one year for the entire multi-year duration of this blog! This is a monumental achievement to be sure, or perhaps it's but a surprisingly consistent exercise in ambivalence and mediocrity--you be the judge! Just kidding, don't judge me!

DIY Fourth of July has come and gone, and I'm making good on my promise of more Fourth of July crafts, however useless they may be on this fifth day of July. You can always bookmark it for next year, like some organized person who plans things a year in advance and then follows through on those plans (a wizard?!).

First off, remember those spray painted jars? I did go ahead and rough them up with sandpaper, to great effect. They looked distressed in a Pinterest-y way, not a distressing way. 

Next I worked on a wreath. I purchased a wooden ring for a Christmas wreath that never got made, so that served as the base. I had a remnant piece of cream canvas which I stained with chicken grease that was perfect for this project, so I cut it into strips and wrapped it around the wooden ring, hot gluing the back as I went along. 

Next I cut out a series of circles in different shades of blue and red, plus cream, and stitched some on top of each other. I hot glued the circles in a kind of overlapping clump on one side of the circle to create a cool mod yet rustic wreath.

Here's a closeup of the circles. 

Additionally, I added to my fake rocket decorations with what I deemed to be a clever idea from Tobi: making a rocket that looked like it had exploded. 

I did this by spray painting a toilet paper tube red, then painting the inside black with a small paintbrush. I made vertical snips into the top with scissors and then curled each tab down to give it that exploded look. Boom! Additionally, I made a huge rocket with an old mailing tube. I spray painted it white and then used red duct tape to attempt a moderately successful chevron pattern on its body. I made a big rocket top from some shiny paper. 

Another simple, classy decor idea is to place little sprays of baby's breath in jars, and colorful straws add some fun to the beverage table. For a nonalcoholic drink, I served water with lime wheels, watermelon chunks and cucumber slices.  

Here's a photo of my sister along with a few of my decor elements in action: triangle flag banners and sparklers!

All in all, this has been another very successful party, and one scientist roughly estimates that my simple, clean and creative decor added 47 percent more festive fun to the atmosphere. This scientist is more of a "scientist of the world" than, like, a research lab scientist. Also, there was no control party to compare with, so you can take this study as you like. Hey, scientific literacy isn't exactly my strong suit--something I share with many of the rest of my fellow Americans. God bless us & happy birthday, USA! 

DIY Fourth of July

I’m usually rather underwhelmed by the Fourth of July, but this year I’m feeling pretty patriotic. With the recent demise of DOMA and Prop 8, and Wendy Davis’ heroic—if  symbolic—stand against the Texas legislature’s disingenuous bill that undermines women’s right to choose in that state, I’ve got some topical new reasons to be proud to be an American. Additionally, we’re hosting a family Fourth of July party! Yay! 

There are certainly some challenges to hosting a cool Fourth of July party. For one, I don’t like too much red, white and blue as a color scheme. It’s also easy to foray into cheesy territory with patriotic decor. I wanted a more vintage “Americana” look than a “Yee-haw, America!” theme to my décor. A lot of these decorative crafts can be made by even the novice crafter/party planner and they have exponential atmosphere-enhancing effects—lots of Fourth of July bang for your crafting buck!   

I started simple. Using scrapbook paper and string, I strung together a bunch of triangle flags in red and white, or blue and white patterns. A hanging decoration of this sort adds a lot of jovial ambiance for a very tiny effort. I made a ton of these. Another simple construction paper background decoration is a set of paper ring chains. 

Next I dug out some white and red spray paint and added color to some of my many small Mason jars. I'll use them for plasticware or straws and whatnot. I might rough these up with some sandpaper to add a little old-timeyness to them. 

I also found an old Christmas basket, which I turned into a Fourth of July basket by painting the green stripe around it white-ish. I put boxes of sparklers in it. That’s a twofer: decorations that double as party favors! 

From there I upped the ante with some toilet paper and paper towel tube rockets. First I spray painted them red. I found some white ribbon and hot glued two pieces wrapping around the longer one. For the other I busted out my stamping supplies and cut out star stamps to decorate the tube. It was moderately successful, but I liked how it turned out looking sponge-painted and a bit rustic. For the tops I cut circles from colored paper, made a slit, folded them into cones and glued them in place. Then I hot glued them to the rocket body. I stuffed the tubes with newspaper and then shoved a bamboo skewer in the center, and I even went so far as to hot glue a little piece of string up there for the faux fuse. Authenticity.   

As you can see, these are very lifelike and pretty cool looking rockets. 

Before you think, “Wow, you really go overboard with the party decorations,” allow me to share with you one of my top rules of party planning: a barren partyscape is a fun desert (As in, there's no fun as far as the eye can see. You might think you see an oasis of fun around the punch bowl, but no, it's a mirage!).  Without some touches of festivity, it’s just a random gathering at your house. Boring! Decorations make it a party. They tell your guests, “Hey, this didn’t happen by accident! You came here to party and I have MADE FOR YOU A PARTY!"  

And there's a lot more where these came from, so rev up your party engine and stay tuned for the next installment of my DIY Fourth of July!   

Romper Lust

I have a thing with rompers. I really love them. They're everything a clothing item should be in the summertime--playful, minimal, slightly ridiculous. You can do a cartwheel in them. Unless, like me, you can't actually do a cartwheel without damaging your fragile 27-year-old wrists. In that case, don't even try. Instead, get yourself a romper, then throw a backyard barbecue to celebrate said romper and be the most appropriately dressed person at the event! If you have friends with young children attending your barbecue, be prepared to be out-rompered and out-sassed by those tots. That's OK. You can shine while sharing the spotlight. The little bitches. 

My romper love runs so deep that yesterday I actually went into a store and had a perfect romper put on hold so I could retrieve it after depositing my paycheck today. Then I went home and made myself a romper out of a frumpy thrift store dress. Then I still went back to the store today to buy the initial romper. 

Say "romper" again.

This is what I started with: an oversized 90s-ish frock made from a pretty turquoise material in that airy, slightly see-through fabric that I imagine an older woman who wears slips might wear regularly. 

Unfortunately I didn't take many photos of my process with the romper, because I felt like it might not come out and I didn't want to jinx it. Basically I cut the top and skirt apart from each other, then took in the top and cut off the sleeves. For the bottom, I used a pair of my shorts folded in half as a pattern to make two halves of the shorts, but I made them longer and flowier than the pattern shorts. Then I sewed together the two crotch parts--that part that sticks out when you fold a pair of shorts in half. From there it was easy to see where to sew up the butt and frontal seams. I messed up and sewed the last seam backwards, had to rip it out and then re-sew it. Learning!

I also sewed a sash piece in the waist because I thought the top was too short initially. Then I just sewed them together. Voila, romper!

This cat Ollie is an important part of my creative process and, as this photo makes clear, she loves me very much with all her kitty heart. 

If my penchant for sewing myself rompers and anthropomorphizing my cat's feelings didn't already clue you in to my special brand of badassery, then this final photo definitely will. I loved the weird button situation on top of the dress, but the white collar and everything made it look too "buttoned up" for my taste. Luckily, all those unnecessary buttons gave me plenty of options for buttoning the top wide open to then wear over a white camisole. 

Easter Crafts!

For Easter this year, I decided to head off the possibility that my family could plan a luncheon at Golden Corral by offering to host an Easter brunch. I started painstakingly planning the menu and decor a few weeks in advance, and spent the week leading up to Sunday excitedly trying different natural egg dyeing techniques and making prospective timelines for the weekend. I. Was. Ready. 

For the eggs, I looked online for the various things that can be used to naturally dye eggs, and just kind of did my own thing. I would take whatever the color ingredient was, mix it with about 1/8 to 1/4 cup white vinegar, and place it in a glass bowl overnight or for around eight or nine hours. I mixed it around every so often. 

Above is the blueberry mixture. I thawed frozen berries and mashed them with a fork, added vinegar, and then the eggs. On the right is turmeric. I loved this color! I used several tablespoons of turmeric. 

Above from top to bottom is turmeric, blueberry and coffee. The coffee just made it look like a normal brown egg, but I did enjoy the speckles and inconsistencies in the shade. 

For this one, I put the eggs in there with beet peels and vinegar. I was so excited about this color. When I finally took out all the eggs and put them in various centerpieces and decorative bowls, I felt like fucking Martha Stewart. Unfortunately, being natural and whatnot, these colors faded in the sun, and my beautiful brunch took place in the backyard in the unforgiving beams of color-killing sunshine. Thanks a lot, sun! 

I thought I was really clever coming up with the whole wreath and green Spanish moss thing, but then I looked back at the initial website that inspired me and noticed how I just stole exactly what that person did. There are no new ideas! 

Here's another amazing idea I stole from the internet. It's an Easter banner made from paint swatches! I loved it! Here it is blowing in the wind above the food table.  

These are some little tulip toothpicks I made with hot glue and pretty paper. They were for the fruit, but no one used them except me. Maybe they thought they were too pretty to use. Maybe I didn't make it clear enough that I wanted people to spear their fruit with tiny spring-inspired toothpicks. Party planner problems. 

For the table settings, I utilized my huge stash of small glass jars. Each one served as a water glass, but initially I set a colorful napkin and a fork in each one. 

For the lamb and potatoes, I made two white sauces; one minty and one filled with horseradish. I didn't want people to be confused and I also wanted an excuse to make another tiny paper and toothpick craft, so I killed two crafty birds with one stone and labeled them with these adorable egg-shaped markers. 

Here's me checking on my crown rack of lamb. 

My crafty decorations and elaborate menu were fawned over by all, and we got tons of great photos of our loved ones having a fabulous Easter! Thanks to my exhaustive planning and timeline-making, the brunch was an absolute smashing success. Special thanks  also to the mimosa bar. Feliz Pescua!